Thursday, February 9, 2012

Confession

I have two confessions. I'm ready to come clean.

Deep breath

I have a junk drawer and I'm a hypocrite.

Wow! That feels good. Glad to get it off my chest. Yup, world, I have random junk that finds it's way into the very large utensil drawer in my kitchen. I open the drawer at least a dozen times a day and the junk laughs at me, but I don't care. And really...I don't. Everyone has a drunk drawer, right? Neat freak, Monica Gellar, had a whole junk closet. But, there's an aspect of my junk drawer that I have a teensy, tiny problem with...the butcher's knife.

Which brings me to confession number two. I'm a hypocrite. I stand on my pedestal, claiming I'd never have a gun in my house with kids. It's just so dangerous. You never know what may happen...blah, blah, blah. And here I am, with a butcher's knife in my junk drawer. There's no safety lock on the drawer, oh no, that would be too smart. But, in case you're wondering, there are 2 child safety locks inside the drawer, just waiting to be used. You wanna know the real hypocritical part of it all, oh it's a shocker?! When I finally decided to clean the drawer out, it wasn't because I was worried my daughter would get hurt. Nope, I was concerned that I was going to be hurt riffling in the drawer. She gets a straw out of the drawer daily, and it's my well being I was looking out for.

Hanging my head in shame. Waiting for the stones to be thrown.

But, it's over. I've been to confession. Said my Hail Mary's. I've cleaned out the drawer.

And the tally, among other really special items...

Wanna grow a garden? 4 packets of seeds

Build a chopstick house? 13 take out chopsticks

Secure the aforementioned house together? 36 screws

Draw all over an heirloom desk? 3 sharpies

Poison a small child? 5 bottles of various medicines and vitamins

Tie dye shirts for your family? 21 rubber bands

And finally...

Arm yourself against rape and pillage? A chef's knife, a carving knife, 3 paring knives, and a meat fork

Glad that's over.

 

1 comment:

  1. But where's the "after" photo??!! ~klw

    ReplyDelete